May 21, 2002

FedEx idea

Recently I sent a query letter to a literary agent. The first query letter in what I thought would be a long line of query letters, each one the result of a rejection from the previous agent on the list. Much to my surprise, the first agent I wrote to LOVED my query and asked to see my book proposal. So I FedExed it yesterday and have been monitoring the status of the package as it makes its way through FedEx's tracking system. The package arrived at 09:40 this morning. That's where the tracking data ends.

Why end there, is what I say!! Think of it: FedEx could offer post-delivery tracking (TM) which would provide customers with the ability to track their package once it arrives at its destination! Find out when the recipient actually opens it. Find outwhat their reaction is, all in real time! Imagine, from the comfort of your own home, you could monitor a post-delivery tracking from your browser. It might look something like this:

     5/21/02    09:40:00am     CITY, ST      Package delivered
     5/21/02    10:07:39am     CITY, ST      Package opened by receptionist
     5/21/02    11:19:00am     CITY, ST      Receptionist hands pkg to agent
     5/21/02    11:19:47am     CITY, ST      Agent walks to office, closes door
     5/21/02    11:19:51am     CITY, ST      Agent sit down in chair, opens pkg
     5/21/02    11:19:59am     CITY, ST      Agent reads cover letter, smiles
     5/21/02    11:20:13am     CITY, ST      Agent opens presentation folder
     5/21/02    11:20:15am     CITY, ST      Agent pulls proposal out of folder
     5/21/02    11:20:16am     CITY, ST      Agent starts reading but phone rings
     5/21/02    11:25:00am     CITY, ST      Agent on phone 
     5/21/02    11:30:00am     CITY, ST      Agent on phone
     5/21/02    11:35:00am     CITY, ST      Agent on phone
     5/21/02    11:40:00am     CITY, ST      Agent still on phone
     5/21/02    11:41:50am     CITY, ST      Assistant interrupts agent on phone
     5/21/02    11:41:54am     CITY, ST      Agent back on phone
     5/21/02    11:42:02am     CITY, ST      Agent hangs up phone, resumes reading

Yes, I think this would be a very nice service. FedEx should most certainly start offering it. :-)

Posted by brian at 01:19 AM | Comments (0)

May 11, 2002

Digital vs Analog Movies

With the arrival of the digitally-made Star Wars: The Attack of The Clones, the talk is heating up about analog versus digital cinemas. Digital theatres... I can see it now: when there's a mishap, instead of the audience seeing the film jam in the projector and melt and burn right in front of our eyes, we'll get the blue screen of death.

I think I'm going to always prefer the old way. Film melting and burning on a huge screen before an audience is always an aesthetically interesting experience. Plus, you know that if you and your fellow audience-goers clap, and yell, and make enough noise, eventually someone at the concession stand outside comes in to find out what's going on, and notifies the manager who notifies the projectionist who goes and fixes the problem and in five minutes, or fifteen, you're back to watching the movie again, albeit a few feet of footage less than you paid for.

In the digital theatre, the projectionist, wearing headphones blaring the 2010 version of Metallica, will be sitting in his jammies at home in a darkened room, black except for the light from his flat LCD monitor. He'll be scanning blogs and chatting with hax0r dudes and dudettes worldwide while in a little corner of his screen a little dialog box unsuccessfully begs for attention: "Display error -279 at Multiplex 6, Screen 19. Unable to continue movie. Audience is waiting. Abort, retry, cancel?"

Posted by brian at 01:18 AM | Comments (0)

May 06, 2002

Spam

TODAY I noticed that the money that the spams say I MAY HAVE ALREADY WON has been increasing regularly over the past two months. First I may have already won $50,000. Then that doubled. Then it was $1 million. Then THAT doubled. Then five million, and THAT doubled.

And now I just got a spam saying I may have won $15,000,000.00. I sense a pattern. I figure I'll wait til they say I may have already won $1 billion. No, actually I'll delete that one too.

Posted by brian at 01:17 AM | Comments (0)
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