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You Don't Want Mark Zuckerberg In Your Dreams

Ever had a dream that skirts the boundaries of nightmare, wants to become a nightmare, but teases at skirting the boundary, just going on and on, with one of those really unpleasant antagonists who’s right out of some suspense thriller movie, the kind of antagonist who’s a menace in the dream, keeping you on edge, making you think you may wind up in self-defense hand-to-hand-combat in the very next moment?

I had that kind of dream two nights ago and I’m still thinking about it. The antagonist in the dream? Get this: Mark Zuckerberg. Yes, I know. Weird. Zuckerberg has broken into our home in a home invasion situation. And he’s bothering me and my wife. And he’s poking around looking at all our stuff, asking questions, like a snake, slithering into each room, picking stuff up, examining it with disgust, moving on to something else, always making you feel he’s going to break something, or hurt you.

Like I said, weird. Never had a dream like this before. Never had a Mark Zuckerberg dream before. Hopefully this was the last one.

The dream ended like these dreams often end: at some point my sleeping mind said, WTF, BASTA, enough of this nonsense. Out with you, Mark Zuckerberg! For dreams like this, there are only two ways out. You either command it to effing end, the way Captain Picard would suddenly command the Holodeck to shut down, or you wind up in some kind of scary situation where you suddenly wake up and go, geez, what was all that about. For this one, I pulled a Picard.

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The Friendly Orange Glow: The Story of the PLATO System and the Dawn of Cyberculture, by Brian Dear
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